I mentioned a while back that I bought an electronic version of Dr. Neil Fiore's The Now Habit. This is a great book about tackling procrastination (the ugly evil "P" word) at its roots. I admit, I have been wanting to read this book in its entirety for a while, but I have only read portions of it so far. Much of what I have read so far truly reflects my own thoughts and actions. For instance, Fiore talks about how we avoid certain tasks; how we talk to ourselves while we are avoiding those tasks (i.e., "I should be working on this, or I have to work on that). Right now, I should be working on my 3 conference presentations for the upcoming weekend. Undoubtedly, I am interested in the work that I am presenting, or I wouldn't have done the work and submitted the papers/abstracts in the first place. However, I am putting it off. I keep telling myself, "I should be working on the outlines/powerpoint for these presentations." Sometimes, spend a good amount of time working on one outline, but then I get restless and switch to working on another one, or something else entirely. Sometimes, I just get sick of sitting (nevermind my back pain and sciatica which is exacerbated by this continual sitting); I walk around the house, get sidetracked by dishes or laundry, or toys all over the floor that are driving me crazy; I find an excuse to go outside and get fresh air. Other times, I just feel like my attention span is severely shrinking as time goes on, and I just can't spend an extended amount of time on one task. Other times, I sit there thinking about how I "should" have somehow found more time to work on my dissertation proposal as opposed to these conference-related projects all summer (granted, I would like to turn at least one of these into a publishable journal article, but still--- none of these projects are explicitly related to my dissertation). Thus, there are times that I take a few minutes out in between to search for articles related to my dissertation topic. As a result, I get sidetracked from projects that should be more of a priority at the present time. Other times, of course, I get distracted by Facebook, e-mail, forums that discuss by favorite addicting Hindi serials, working on my syllabi for the upcoming semesters' courses, hoping that my kids are doing fine at day care, feeling guilty that if I could just somehow work better in the evenings we could have saved some money on day care-- if we could communicate better about our schedule I could have somehow found regular time in the evenings/on weekends to work, etc etc etc and the rabbit trail of thoughts goes on. Really, I am my own worst enemy when it comes to time management. I think part of it has to do with just being frustrated about a plethora of interrelated issues; another part is attention span and getting bored with work that requires continuous sitting and solute. I often think back to my former job, the one I left before starting grad school again. As a social worker, I was constantly talking with clients and other co-workers. It was insanely busy at times, but it was also insanely rewarding. It's funny, because no matter what situation we are in in life, we tend to think of how the "grass is greener" in one way or another-- whether we are thinking back to another phase of our lives, or we think of how our lives would have been if we had a "normal" job, or if we didn't have to worry about a certain project, or if we could have more carefree time with our family, etc. Either way, I admit that I have a serious time management problem, and I guess that is the first step with trying to tackle it. Now, if only I could make the time (and not procrastinate!!!) to read Fiore's book and put the principles he sets forth into practice. If only I could just get these presentations DONE, especially since I only have 3 days before I leave for the conferences!!!! Here's to trying to focus and not talking myself into a pit! I need to perform cognitive behavioral therapy on myself!
